How does it make you feel when somebody says no to you? It’s like it suddenly jets you back to the time when you were 3 years old and had been thwarted with whatever it was that you were doing. For me, anyway, it doesn’t feel good. It’s like a jolt of electricity. Then, all sorts of defensive things swing into play and the overall feeling is just not very good.

What I would like is whenever anybody says no to me that I am okay with it whatever the no is about; that I don’t have any annoying reactions like catching my breath, or feeling my face get all hot and red. None of that. Just calm, cool and collected. And, not be bothered one bit that somebody just told me no.

Actually, if you remember anything about being 3 years old you did it anyway. Maybe I should too.

Time Management

I’m having a hot flash. I just got a really tingly idea that might be of great benefit today for me. I’m going to set the timer for how much time I will spend surfing the net. It appears I can sit here and get numb butt and sore wrist and not come away from the experience any wiser or with any degree of satisfaction in place.

Hence, the timer. If I apply the rules of universal manifestation to my own surfing situation here I could probably think if it hasn’t happened in the given amount of time it’s not going to happen. On the up side of this supposition is the idea that I’m going to have more time in my day to do other things.

Things that have been neglected lately, like updating this blog and work on my hobbies that have gone by the wayside. I suppose what sort of brought all this about was the question that came to mind a few days ago: What would I do if I only had 10 years left to live? So, I will post this and see how many other interesting things I can do with the rest of my Sunday. Have a nice one.

Saturday Morning

I have a job. Lots of people do. Sometimes I don’t feel like being there, but I go anyway. We’ve got bills to pay and the money I earn there is necessary for my family’s finances. Also, I’m expected to be there every morning and stay through the day doing “stuff”. What’s my point? I do this every day. Well, every week day. I’m regular as clockwork. I can’t point to any great body of work that I complete every day as what I did that day. I just get stuff done; the things that come up. Sometimes I have time to work on a project, but mostly it feels like treading water. But, if I weren’t there to do the stuff I do I think a lot of people would be unhappy. So, even though this isn’t a particularly soul satisfying job it is necessary for both my finances and for getting stuff done at my company.

My point? If I were as regular with my at home projects, if I chipped away at them the same way I show up at work every day I would have a hell of a lot more done that I could point to.

For instance:

All my jewelry projects. I’ve got lots and lots of supplies. Now, I have an Ott light to be able to see well anytime at all. All I need to do is clean up the area, organize my supplies into a more manageable collection and have at it. So much to learn. So much to do.

All my web-based projects. Oh, these are extensive. Some of these I started years ago and have just not continued on in any consistent basis. Most would have to do with updating Talking to Spirit. There’s something wrong with that site that it just needs a facelift. A new page or something. I’d started one called, “Last Words”. The last words famous and not so famous people have uttered as they slipped this mortal coil. That was a project I felt I could get my teeth into. I’d like to move forward on it.

More reading. Well, I am moving forward here. Books all over the place. Reading 3 and 4 at a time. Maybe try to concentrate on one and get it done.

Writing. It’s like a surge, an ocean wave that washes over me periodically. It’s this compulsion to put it onto paper. What? Anything at all. What I’d like for this to be is a focused putting down on paper. Let’s have a point to it; a goal. That’s what I’d like.

Why am I in such a hurry to do this stuff? I feel time is slipping away from me. The years just compress upon themselves so quickly. I meet people and say, “What? You were in diapers the last time I saw you.” It seems like only yesterday and now the person in question is in high school.

So, that’s it for this morning. Wish me luck and maybe I can get a bit more organized this morning.

Grump

I’ve been even tempered lately, which might explain why I haven’t made any entries into this blog. As I move into the weekend I have more time and energy to make entries into my 5 blogs: The Spirit Moved Me – Where I Read Books – Learn to Channel – Where I Bead – Learn Spanish With Me One Word a Day - and this one – Where the Psychic Vents. There's also Talking to Spirit that I could spend lots of time tweaking too. This weekend I updated all of them except the Books one (I’m still reading, “The Reeve’s Tale” by Margaret Frazer) and this one. Like I said, I’ve been mostly even tempered lately.

Except, I figured I could grouse around about this: I’m thinking about making another blog. You think I don’t already have enough to do? I’ve got a full time job. I just embarked on a cross stitch project. I’m thinking about doing the NaNoWriMo – National Novel Writing Month in November. And, I’m thinking about another blog? It’s happened at last. I’ve gone over the edge. Maybe this is a new reaction to trying to lose weight. A new way to express tension?

Anyway, what I was thinking about was a food blog. They are very popular. I see the number of comments that come in at 101 Cookbooks, one of the blogs I like. My blogs have never seen that many comments. Face it, what are people interested in? Food. Sex. Losing weight. Money. None of my blogs address those issues. Instead, I go for spirituality and the psychic angle. Sort of interesting, but not something folks are going to be riveted by. Not unless I can get somebody in Spirit to talk about sex on the astral planes.

Now, the question is can I somehow get this food blog to have a psychic angle? Or a spiritual angle? That would be interesting.

You might ask the question of why I want a popular blog? Well, I spend enough time at it. I see the number of hits that come in. I also have yea olde ads parked along the sidelines that are supposed to make money. Hand over fist. Yeah, right. It would be nice to make a bit of dough. If there was enough to pay the rent each month I’d be happy instead of dinner at McDonald’s. I’d be real happy. So, after all of this we get down to what’s really bothering me. I’d like to be making some money at this.

Thank God Tomorrow is Friday

There are some things I just won’t blog about. Some things that just are too private to put out there on the internet. They’re not bad or anything like that. It’s just nobody’s business. So, seeing as how I’m the one doing the writing I say whether it goes out into the public eye or not.

However, this also is part of why I don’t want to write honestly. This is a problem. I know I’ve heard a bunch of places that a writer’s first novel is pretty much autobiographical. My first novel sits in the closet. There may also be a copy of it under the bed. It didn’t even get as far as being autobiographical. In fact, it sucked. This concerns me. What’s the second novel going to be like?

Well, the question just got asked (by an invisible guide), “What exactly do you want to write about?” Well, what I’d like to write about is a romance. Except I can’t write gushy love scenes. I can read them easily enough, but try to write one? No way. Also, going back to the honesty, how can I be honest with my characters? How can I portray a believable character?

And, worst of all. What if somebody I know reads this stuff? This is worse than being a psychic. That I can be mum about and just not tell anybody. They ask me what I do. I say I’m a mean secretary. I’ve gotten a lot of mileage out of that one. That’s as far as I want to go. I do not want to go around saying, “Not only am I a mean secretary, but I’m psychic. So, don’t cross me. I regularly put curses on people. At least, I try.” How many friends are you going to have if you say things like that? I think I’m off on a tangent here.

You know what? I need a book. The two I have next to read I just don’t feel like reading. I’ve got, “The Feeling Buddha” by David Brazier and “The Primal Scream” by Arthur Janov. I just don’t feel like reading either one. I just finished reading, “Four to Score” by Janet Evonovich. Perfect. I wrote a review about it on my other blog. Something by her again. I’ll go to the library tomorrow after work. In the meantime, what? One of the guides said, “Just relax”. That’s a good one. Maybe that’s what I’ll do.

Blog Children

It’s taken me a little bit of time to get accustomed to having more than one blog going on at a time. My oldest blog, The Spirit Moved Me and Look What Happened has been around to the tune of 431 entries since August, 2004. My next oldest blog is Learn to Channel, started in November, 2005 with 47 entries. The middle child is Where the Psychic Vents. I’ve had it since October, 2006 and it has 47 entries. Other blogs, depending on what I’m concentrating on are: Learn Spanish With Me with 36 entries since January, 2007, Where I Read Books since April, 2007 with 7 entries and Where I Bead with one measly entry when I started it in April, 2007.

The idea is to develop a blogging base, draw traffic to each of the blogs and especially feed it back to my website Talking To Spirit. I’ve had that going since August, 2001.

Mostly, it was all started to reassure people that there is something to look forward to after you die and to help folks with their grieving. As a side line it morphed into a place where I could give pointers and tips to folks who wanted to learn how to channel too. As I gained weight, developed diabetes, got mean and started going through menopause I needed a place to pull my hair out. That’s when The Psychic Vents was born. Now, that I’m taking lots of Kava Kava, St. John’s Wort, Black Cohosh and other assorted minerals and vitamins I find that I have more energy and have spread my blogging efforts out to other areas.

But, what I was faced with was the idea of being psychic and an upstanding spiritual person with The Spirit Moved Me and Learn To Channel. Then, I could piss and moan and say bad words with The Psychic Vents, try to learn to speak Spanish with Learn Spanish With Me, write about the books I read on Where I Read Books (since I’ve been forgetting I read them and tend to check them out from the library repeatedly it would be nice to keep a record of them) and maybe start some beading projects with all the bead supplies I’ve been buying for years and not done anything with.

So, there it is.

What’s next you say?

Well, I should lose some weight. I could have an exercise a day. Like with this entry I just did 10 minutes worth of walking in place with Leslie Sansone…and, with this one I jogged in front of the microwave amusing (worrying) the parakeets while I waited for my tea to nuke…and, here I strained my back on the new exercise bicycle we have out on the patio. Sort of like the exercising other people do…hit and miss…miss mostly.

Another thing would be the letters I really need to write. Like one entry could be a letter to my father. Another to somebody else I haven’t written to in ages. That might be interesting. Sort of private, but hey, what’s a blog for anyway?

Okay, what else? Chores. I hate chores. Could you make a blog to help you do your chores? Like having a to-do list and each time you do something you blog about it. Want to hear how I do laundry? How sometimes I sort and sometimes I don’t? Like the time my husband’s underwear was pink for 2 months before it all faded to a very soft, almost not even noticeable pink color? Right. Hey, I just got a steam cleaner…We could take pictures of the gross cabinet paper that I need to get off the shelves before I can put nice new paper down.

Can you tell I just took a dose of Kava Kava? What can I say. The stuff really works. It's a good thing DeeDude doesn't read this stuff.